The Billboard Song

This is a song I learned 30 years ago, at Girl Scout camp. I remember it being one of the silliest, and most fun songs of my youth. And that says a lot, considering I grew up in a time when Ray Stevens was at the top of his game, with songs like “The Streak” and “I’m My Own Grandpa”.

I had the lyrics saved on a piece of paper that was handed out to all of us Girl Scouts. I don’t know why I saved it, but it’s one of those things that got put in a special box full of memories. These are the lyrics as I knew them:

As I was walking down the street one dark and dreary day,
I came upon a billboard, and much to my dismay,
The sign was torn and tattered from a storm the night before.
The wind and rain had done its job and this is what I saw:

Smooooooke, Coca-Cola Cigarettes
Chew Wrigley’s Spearmint Beer
Ken-L-Ration Dog Food Makes Your Wife’s Complexion Clear
Simonize Your Baby With A Hershey’s Candy Bar
And Texacola Beauty Cream Is Used By All The Stars

Soooooo Take Your Next Vacation In A Brand New Fridgidaire
Learn To Play Piano In Your Winter Underwear
Doctors Say That Babies Should Smoke Until They’re Three
And People Over Sixty-five Should Bathe In Lipton Tea…

With Flow Thru Tea Bags!

Tonight, this song popped into my head, and I decided to Google it. I was surprised to find that there are so many different versions of the song! The original was done by Homer and Jethro.

Religion is Bullshit

I’ve seen this bit many times, and every time it’s funnier than the last time! I’m a huge fan of George Carlin, and he will be sorely missed by me and millions of others. He had a knack for saying what everyone else is thinking, and much more eloquently, to boot.

So many famous people are atheist that I can’t even keep track of who’s had the balls to “expose” themselves to the rest of the world. But I really do think that it won’t be too much longer (I’m talking generations) before the word “atheist” doesn’t even need to be used anymore.

I’ve heard some X-tians say, “This atheism thing is a new fad.” Apparently they don’t realize – or are in denial – that atheism is older than any religion! Those who didn’t believe in such gods as Zeus, Hercules and other mythical gods were called atheists. Yeah, I’m sure there are some fools out there who still believe that the Earth is held on the shoulders of a god … but the rest of us are firm atheists on this one.

“We are all atheists, I just believe in one less god than you do. When you can understand why you don’t believe in other gods, then you can understand why I don’t believe in yours”

I’ll leave you with a song that I’m sure most people know, if not they’ve at least heard of it. It comes from a generation before mine, from a man whom people loved and respected (like many other prominent historical persons who were atheist).

Imagine, indeed

Brad Paisley – Online

Music video by Brad Paisley performing Online. (C) 2007 Sony Music Entertainment

Naturally 7

I just watched the most incredible performance on Leno’s “Tonight Show”. The group is called “Naturally 7”, and they use not one single instrument, yet they sound as if they have an entire band! You have to see it to believe it!